Originally Written For Good Friday

Hi crackphillies

I hope you're all well. I also hope you giving due reverence to this very special day, where Jesus selflessly gave up the best part of his weekend to suffer for the sins of humanity. What a truly amazing sacrifice. He was then magically resurrected, which in some way actually negated the physical suffering he went through. After all, it's not much of sacrifice if you come back to life a couple of days later, not to mention then going on to receive 2000 years of sycophantic adulation from your own fan club. I sacrificed more when I deleted all my roadkill pornography to save space on my computer's hard drive. Anyway...


Continuing in my commitment to ask and answer the toughest questions in theological studies today.

Question:


DID JESUS OWN A SPEED BOAT?


Answer: No, he didn't.


If you like, send me your question about religion and stuff. I'll do my best to give a completely stupid and facetious answer. I currently have nothing but time and abject desperation for company